Wednesday

make that a skinny latte...thank you!


I woke up this morning, sun shining and a definite smell of summer in the air. Out came the shorts, out came the singlets...quick shower and out the door, breezing passed the full length mirror on my way and WHAAAAATTT...back up the truck!
I was going to say you could have blown me down with a feather, but therein lies the problem, it's going to take a wrecking ball to blow me anywhere these days...I've gotten fat.

How this has happened is, of course, a complete mystery. My initial outrage was directed at the washing machine...

"I can't believe it has shrunk every piece of summer attire I own, and why pick on me ...nobody else's clothes have shrunk"

" Don't feel bad darlin', I like you a little bigger...pleasantly plump..."

A crashing silence descended over the house, the birds stopped singing and a tumbleweed blew quietly past the window.

"Pardon"

"Oh Shit"

It's taken all morning but I have now regained my composure (although marital bliss is still a little short on the ground) and I've already refused half a Bounty and arranged a run after work.
My body is now a temple...all sacrificial offerings should be inedible please.

P.S Check out the little horror found lurking under the frozen peas!
Halloween has been and gone, but this orange and mango icy lantern managed to escape unharmed...

So easy to make, cut off the top of an orange, scoop out the flesh and eat it with sticky fingers. Carve a face into the orange peel and then fill with fruity icecream (mango is best, but chocolate also works well...and yes I know chocolate isn't a fruit, but it is a valuable member of a very important food group, I'm sure)
Refreeze and enjoy...mwah, hah, hah, hah.

8 comments:

  1. That sounds delicious but ice cream? In the temple?! You'll have to go on another run!

    Pomona x

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  2. Absolutely - definitely somewhere in the dairy group and lets not forget the feel good group.

    I'd request some kind of pay back though - from Mr Beach Hut that is??

    Nina xx

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  3. Hello, is this the Temple of Jus?
    What is all this about suddenly getting fat? Tell me about it!! Though I'm pretty sure it has something to do with reaching half of 90.... I can only sympathise with you, dear Jus, because I too am wondering where it all came from and why it is so damned hard to shift....
    Anyway, what's all this? Two posts in two days! Blige - I've got to go visit the plankton now....
    D x

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  4. I have stopped looking in the mirror at all, complete denial indeed. Of course it's cold here and so baking season, I haven't a chance!

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  5. Jus, you are so funny. I know how you feel about the clothes shrinking thing. As I head to tropical queensland all i have that fits are some work clothes (black of course) and my pyjamas. Doesnt bode well. Thanks for your wishes. I love nurse Jackie, it is so dark and I feel a slow steady unravelling about to commence.

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  6. LOL. Too close to home, there Jus!

    Speaking of home, so you had Welsh grandparents too! My grandma never looked bad in it hat. She could pull on the worst-looking jumblesale offering and it would suddenly look good. This skipped past my mum, but I was a great wearer of hats in my teens and early twenties. Somehow a non-functional hat seems pointless when you have children, though.

    I do hope your family get better soon - it seems that something is beginning to work for Son 2's cough!

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  7. Eek, I know how you feel, I've just had baby n° 3 and he seems to have left behind a whole years supply of fat in my thighs..
    My darling husband doesn't say I'm fat he just buys me books on how to get a flat stomach for christmas..oh joy...!

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  8. And winter has only just started! I bought a pair of jeans yesterday at a CS and when I got home they wouldn't do up. How they managed to shrink on the way home is anyone's guess - and I walked!

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