I've just spent a very entertaining 20 minutes perusing the candidate information leaflet that plopped into our mailbox last week.
Local Elections 2010 are imminent and I thought I'd actually have a go at being one of the tiny minority that bother to vote this time around.
Of course, there are heaps of very worthy candidates but the ones that caught my fancy are the extraordinary bunch of (complete nutters) fabulous people who would like to rule my world.
Dave would like to be the Mayor...
Dave is an honest man but his law and order policies are a little bit out there,
"I am a criminal in the sense that I smoke illegal substances. But in my heart I know I am not bad"
Then there's Wayne,
Wayne would also like to be the Mayor and although I admire his candid approach, I'm not sure he would really have my best interests at heart,
"To be honest the salary of a quarter of a million dollars for Mayor appeals"
We finish with my personal favourite, The Whale.
I'm just going to quote verbatim,
"I promise not to: Urinate on any trees; Sign paintings I have not painted; Send drunken texts after 11pm; Send drunken press releases after 11pm; Hold important meetings in bars.... Put boozing with my mates on my council credit card; Stop putting piggy noses on troughing politicians; Punch ambulance officers.
Vote for the Whale
Keeping the people honest (and sober)"